Monday, April 11, 2011

A glimpse inside of me

I cried tonight while I washed off my makeup and took out my contacts.

I watched myself in the mirror and saw the 2 different faces of me.  There was the before...and the after.  The Jenny who could be confident and sure of herself...and the Jenny who doubts what she says and agonizes over things she has done, wondering if they were done right. 

One of my biggest failings is that I have very little confidence in myself.  I can't remember a time that I ever had a positive image of myself.  I'm sure some of you are reading this wondering where this is coming from.  The information above doesn't match with the person you've met and talked to.  But the truth is, this is me, hiding, showing the world a facade.  And it hurts inside to reveal the person beneath like this, but I'm hurting more from trying to hide it.  I don't have the energy to keep showing the world who I wish I was. 

Maybe I can figure out who the real Jenny is. 

1 comment:

  1. wow Jenny you have grown into a wonderful careing young lady.I was surprised when i was just looking for you and the family.And I saw your blog and it just blew me away.Honey I no God will help you find all the peace you desire and need to cope with what your going threw.He will never give you more then you can handle,by the way this is Jackie hope you have not forgot me,.

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